Untiring Heart

6:19:00 PM 0 Comments

Kaya has become childish today. It seems as if her childhood has returned back. She attacks me as a hungry tiger attacks its prey. She is stubborn and remains firm in her attitude. Sometime she comes to sit in my lap as a pet cat. She holds my Collar of Shirt and embraces me. Then she pleads me like a child – "Hey! Let's go to have Chatpate". (Chatpate is a kind of snacks which is made up of puffed rice, grams, Peas, Onions with adding a plenty of spices and lemons)


Kaya is in her early twenties but she still shows her childish nature. Teasing, playing and mocking others are parts of her daily activities. Her devilish smile sometime creates a great trouble to me. But I am a fanatic fan of her childlike personality. I always nod my head to her longings and desires. I don't like to break her delicate heart.


The sky has transformed into a blaze of fire. The Sun has come yellowish. It is a time of dusk. In the distant horizon the black spots of clouds are twinkling. Birds and animals are returning to their habitat after a day long tussle. The day shows early phase of spring season. Environment is quite quixotic. If I were an artist, I would imitate this beauty in my canvas. But I have no option rather than to explain it in words. Time and again, eastern breeze tenderly touches both of us. We are hallucinated by this natural beauty and we are just moving our feet to the destination.


Kaya is a fan of Chatpate which is especially made from the hands of Basanti sister. She always tempts me to come at Basanti sister's shop to have Chatpate with her. I also follow her as an obedient child because I am quite familiar with her stubborn and obsessive nature.

One day Kaya asks– "Hey! What are you reading?"

"Don't you see?" I replied furiously– "I am reading The song of life."

"Oops! How much time do you read this poem?" She screams– "Don't you feel boredom to read it repeatedly?"

"No, I don't feel so. If I feel bore, I will not read it more, you know!" I told her– "You didn't know the real flavour of arts and literature."

"I don't like to read." She answered– "I don't want to be a lunatic."

"Do you mean am I a lunatic?" I lost my temper.

"You know yourself what you are." She tried to teach me– "Real literature can be created only by madmen, hermits, heretics, dreamers, rebellious and skeptics not by diligent trustworthy functionaries."

"If it so." I replied her in a humiliate way– "The sane person like you cannot create literature too."

"Leave it dear, It'd be better if we would cease to debate upon such an endless topic." She says– "Hey! Let's go to have Chatpate."

"Not at all, I am reading." I denied of her proposal– "You can go alone."

"Why do you try to become Superior?" She bursts into anger– "Why do I always have to force you?"

"Try to understand, I won't go." I replied in a polite way– "You go and come soon dear."

"You rascal!" She began to scold me– "Don't show your pig like nature. You can stay here by plunging your mouth in the books."

She slammed on the door and went out. I become astonished and looked at the way she went through in great bewilderment. I called on her mobile phone to persuade her. It is difficult to contact her. She has blocked the incoming call. Then I went to her home like a defeated soldier. She stayed in the room by locking from inside. She didn't respond me and my screaming. After that I am crushed with her stubbornness.

I returned back to my room. After that I become quite busy. I don't have enough time to call her and meet her.

How could she remain silence for a long time! One morning she has returned back to my room with showing her previous pleasant smile. I was also feeling quite loneliness in her absence. I have also become like motionless in the separation with her. I feel that I have lost one of my organs from my body. It is possible because of our intimacy. We always engage in a verbal duel though it creates an extreme happiness among us. I am quite familiar to be near with her. A strange kind of feeling towards Kaya is flowing inside me. It may be the cause of my longing for Kaya.


I love to chat with Basanti sister more than to eat her Chatpate. I am quite enthusiastic to listen her lectures on love and philosophy.

Thin body and wrinkled cheeks were her identity. She seems old but she is still in her prime young. She seems old but she is still in her mid thirties.. She always wears blue Kurtha-shalwar and puts her cart in the central part of city. Her Chatpate was famous in the locality. People assembled from far place to taste the flavour of her Chatpate. Her Chatpate business had become quite famed in that locality.


One day I unexpectedly raised a question to her which was quite personal. I asked her– "You seem to be very busy. What does your husband do?"

After my question, I noticed no change in her countenance. It seems as if she has not heard my question. She remains silence form a moment. I was not supposed to ask such type of question. I feel guilty for my over curiosity.

After A long Pause, she tears the veil of silence. "I don't know what he does. He becomes a stranger for me. He has not any kind of familial relation with me." –She opened herself slowly and gradually. I fall in dilemma with her reply. I couldn't understand what she was intending to say. I had read her countenance earlier. Her life was never spent happily. She squeezed her prime youth like lemon every time. She made pieces of her desires like the pieces of chillies. Her life had winded as puffed rice. I had seen a visible line of dissatisfaction in her visage. Her physical gesture itself was the answer of what was hovering inside her. I wanted to share my inner sentiment with her. But it was impossible in the crowd of her costumers. She was also eager to express her inner feelings. She had become a constant pond which was going to burst out soon. I was eager to weigh her trauma and pain.


Kaya and I were presented at that time. Basanti was silent and she was just staring at my countenance. I expressed my ignorance and asked her–"What kind of stranger was your husband?" She brought a pretending smile in her face and said– "He married with other. So he was a stranger. Don't you know?"

"Oh! This was the matter!" I was trying to go deeper about her familial status. I asked her–"Why did he marry with other?"

"I don't know brother. I am also seeking the answer of this question. What was deficient in me?"–She was expressing her melancholy.

"Why did you close your canteen?" I diverted the topic– "Did you gain loss from the business?"

"Hey! Are you a Journalist?" Kaya lost her temper and said– "Why do you interfere on other's personal matter?"

"Shut your mouth!" I yelled– Kaya remained quiet. Basanti sister was peeling onions. Her eyes were full of tears. It was I who pricked her longstanding wound which was going to heal soon.

There were different kinds of boxes in her Cart. I could saw good packaging of grams, peas, soybeans, peanuts in her cart. Boiled potatoes had been scattered. Kaya picked some green peas and began to eat. I was haunted by seeing such a scene. Then I become nostalgic for my childhood. I begin to recall my past.

Kanchha told– "Hey dude! Do you eat Chatpate?"

We were playing marbles in the dust. Our clothes were painted by muddy water. Probably I was studying in class 3 at that time. We had not gone school that day. My mouth watered by his offer and I said– "I have no money. Do you buy?"

He put forward a bid– "I will buy Chatpate, If you give me all marbles of your pocket."

"OK" I nodded my head in conformity. Rajan uncle's Chatapate cart was there every evening. I didn't know how much he studied but he muttered some words of English every time. We burst in laughter when we heard his English. We understand some of his words but didn't understand most of the words. Kanchha told– "Uncle, give me Chatpate of two rupees."

Accidentally my eyes stopped at green peas which were scattered in a plate. Elders ate those peas when they ordered Rajan uncle to prepare Chatpate. Rajan uncle didn't say anything to them. I also longed to pick up some peas in delight. I mingled my dirty hands in that plate. By seeing that Rajan uncle slapped me on my face. After that I lost my consciousness. I didn't know when I returned to my home. I just remembered that some people come and sprinkled some water for helping me to regain consciousness. Some people scolded Rajan Uncle– "What would happen if he died? Why did you slap a child in an aggressive way?" After then, Rajan Uncle provided me Chatpate. I ate that like a hungry man.

I have become semi-conscious. I rouse immediately after listening Kaya's utter laughter. A page of remembrance has just flown inside me at that moment. Basanti sister was narrating her tale of struggle.

"Here life itself is in a great loss. There is no need to talk about canteen." She was going through her saga. Someone has torn the veil of her congested heart today–

"We had opened our canteen near of a college. The business was going well. Students and lectures were crowded in our canteen. My husband handled the counter. I would be busy in kitchen works. We gained a lot of profit from our business. But slowly and and gradually I noticed a change in my husband's behaviour. He became more careless in his responsibility. He preferred to spare his time with college girls. Our business was on the verge of breakdown."

One evening,

"Why did our business go on loss?" I wanted amplification from my husband.

"We had a lot of credit."– He tried to get rid of this circumstance.

"How could we manage the credit? You hadn't entered anyone's name in the ledger?" – I lost my temper.

"What?" He made a louder voice. "Don't throw your suspicion upon me?"

After then he abused and harassed me by taking other males name. Then he left me and went out from the home. Time has gone but he didn't return. I said some words on despair but this was not the proper way to punish me. One day I became surprised. My pillar of devotion towards him had been destroyed. I saw him at market passing by with another girl. She was the girl with whom he used to spend most of his time at canteen. My whole body withered. I wept whole night. My daughters were also cried but they even didn't know the matter. I regained the zeal for survival. I have to search an elixir of life. I had to collect some rays of hope for my daughters.

"You have to place husband in your palm." Kaya suggested her– "Why didn't you file a case of polygamy in the police?"

"Kaya, love couldn't happen in potent manner." She controlled herself and began to convince Kaya– "I left him in freedom forever because I had a true love for him and today also I love him more. He didn't like to stay with me forever which was the great problem amongst us. I can't compel him anymore. I am able to solve my hand-to-mouth problem. I take this sort of determination."

"At least he has to think a bit about these daughters- his own blood. What a cruel man like a Vampire!"

"Yeah, brother!" She said– "Now these daughters even don't like to listen his name too."

Chatpate became distaste for me. I completely become shocked by listening her tragic story. Kaya also felt the same. I couldn't find childishness in her eyes.

"Sissy, apply more lemon in my Chatpate, OK!" Kaya was very fond of hot, spicy and sour Chatpate.

"OK sister, I will do as your wish." She began to mock her– "I hope brother's life will never become sour. He is very good and honest for me."

Kaya began to giggle– "Yeah, now I will drown him in the lemon syrup."

Ha ha ha..!!!. Laughter fills in the air. I saw Basanti sister laughing for the first time.


At last,

Nowadays the scenario has become enchanting there. Basanti sister has got an intimate companion. Another Chatapate Cart has been added near her cart. Ramlal really loves Basanti sister. Two chatpate hearts have become one. When there are no costumers, they burst in laughter. Basanti sister can be seen as chatting with Ramlal. The brightness of happiness can be noticed in her visage. On the other side Kaya has changed drastically but her Childish nature remains same. Today she is going to read Ghanachakkar. She also begins to seek life in literarture.

नयाँ पुस्तक, पत्रपत्रिका पढ्न, फिल्म हेर्न अब्सेसिभ छु । केही क्रियटिभ कुरा फुर्यो भने ब्लग लेख्ने गरेको छु । तपाईजस्तै म पनि आफ्नो पहिचान र स्पेश खोज्ने योद्धा हुँ ।

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